"Will Dockery", remarked:
> "Renay St. James" <***@prettyprettyprincess.com> wrote
>
> > > > > > Sunglass.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > This battered old shell
> > > > > > looks like a death mask.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Lucky or not I shall wear it
> > > > > > as I walk into Phenix City.
> > > > > > Though I cheated in my gambling
> > > > > > I wound up broke anyway.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > And I come, and I pay
> > > > > > the zombie whores and walking dead.
> > > > > > While the dark lady in sunglasses
> > > > > > takes the halo from his clay head.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > One more trip over that bridge
> > > > > > to the kissing booth.
> > > > > > Where there's smoke there may be fire
> > > > > > and this time I got burned.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > I walk this beach at midnight
> > > > > > like a zen dharma beach bum.
> > > > > > And I am saved, and I turn.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > I watch the drunken poets, and my lawyer.
> > > > > > While the dark lady in sunglasses
> > > > > > takes the halo from his clay head.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > -Will Dockery (c)2003
>
> > > "Getting into it" is not how I'd describe it. But I *will* defend myself.
> >
> > against WHAT? people who try to pat you on the head
> > like all you are is a photograph without a brain? mindless
> > insults about sucking up and sucking cock? I see.
>
> Yeah, on this sober Sunday I feel I went too far with the "cock
> sucking" comments to JJWeb [Blue]. I keep reminding myself to take it
> easy and not get too deep in the flame games stuff... I'll track him
> down and give him an apology.
Your textual insult isn't criminal.
But I contend that mikey's gay dipiction and his posting it publicly
constitutes defamation. Did you happen to save the animation?
Anyone?
>
> On this sober Sunday, I realise that I jumped in too far, in ager,
> because of all the comments here, his hit home closest, hit a nerve,
> so to speak.
>
> Money *has* always been tight, I've never really made what might be
> considered "great" money, decent jobs over the years, for Shadowville,
> but nothing spectacular. And certainly not from poetry.
For me, money was never "tight", but then never /that/ loose.
During the 90's I didn't look at price tags much except for things like
yachts and jet boats and I was buying toys at a frantic pace.
After a stumble recently I think I'm good for one more
/run/. Always a question. :-)
I fell in the briars and my ass still hurts.
If I fall in briars too much I'll never get anywhere in life. :-)
>
> Add to that the *fact* that outside of Shadowville [which even here I
> can't, or won't, make any noticable $$$ from the words/music/art]
> relatively few people know me as a poet... and here, in many quarters,
> I'm more infamous than famous... the underground types all know me,
> artists, musicians, as well as the *sleazier* elements, and strangely,
> the "academic" types never jeer or heckle me, but they probably like
> me personally well enough to ignore my poems when I flub up some
> verses... and point out "good" lines... some probably admire my rough
> edged, "self taught" style:
Most people in person are more reserved, yes.
Colin would probably not stand in front of your house
screaming "Dockery's poetry is unspeakable shit"
even if he lived next door to you.
>
> I *did* make it this far, as short a distance it arguably is, against
> pretty much impossible odds. Grade and High School here in the 1970s
> for whatever reason seemed intent on smashing this "poetry" idea I
> had, for probably exactly the reasons most of you hate me: I did it on
> my own, and didn't [don't] tend to listen to "sage advice"... there's
> no "literary" background in my family, really, and my mother and
> uncles [mother's side] were the first people in my family to go to
> college, though I suppose some Dockerys or Whitleys [or Lawsons or
> Darlymples] may have attended college hundreds of years ago in the
> "old country"...
That won't help :-)
> the Creek, Cherokee, Choctaw, et cetera, of course,
> had a very different system of higher learning... both sides of my
> family are very typical Southern families, comfortable, but never
> "rich".
Geneticaly you are predestined to be what you are.
If you mate with a few academics who mate with a
few academics in a few generations there will be
a new order of Dockery, but Shadowville will never
be the same.
:-)
>
> And it's true I've dropped out of college... *three* times. It's true
> that I never had that "drive" to amass grand amounts of money and
> material things... the conceit [sic?] is: I'm a poet, and not
> concerned with material things. I make enough money to "get by"... the
> wives and countless women I've loved and lost would agree more with
> the judgement of the newsgroup trolls: I'm a lazy sod.
Ha!
Perhaps I could hire you.
That's all I ever hire.
>
> I like to brag that one of the great things about being a "povert
> stricken poet" is that I know a woman loves me for *me*, not my money.
> *grin*
>
> But, yeah, it hurts when they give up and drift away. Sometimes due to
> "incredible" hardships I put them through, lack of money, security, et
> cetera, sometimes because I'd rather run around with my cronies of the
> season, playing at being a poet, getting pats on the back for being
> "Will Dockery, outlaw poet of Shadowville", sometimes because I get
> blinded by the cheap thrills of playing the hard drinking groupie
> shagger, and time after time expect the "little lady" to be sitting
> happily at home, waiting for "Neal Cassady" to drive up and light up
> her life... although the power's turned off and she might be sitting
> by a fireplace, reading his poetry by candle light. A romantic notion,
> unless you have *no choice*, Dark Queen and I both agreed, some years
> after we gave it up. She went back home to her mother, and I went off
> to "fame" with a group of Phish/Deadheads...
>
> Anyhow, before I went off into this Kerouac chapter, on this Sober
> Sunday, is that yes, yes, yes, after years of flaming and
> grandstanding, I admit that Renay, Colin, Tom, and several others here
> are right in much of what they write: my poetry could *at least* stand
> some rewrite, some "distance". My Kerouac et al "never change a word"
> "philosophy" boils down, at least partially, to being a lazy sod.
> Content to dash out some "poems" and rely on performance and flashy
> "beatnik" presentation to score.
No crime, and poetry, if it is to ever have a /resurgence/ must resurge
on all levels.
I think you could write better with some crafting and dictionary work.
You could also pay someone (or partner in some other way) to
help you punch it up.
Or you could continue "as is".
>
> And that doesn't go over like Flint on a text based medium, with
> people that *have* sweated and studied the "craft".
Demonstrably not, but so?
>
> Anyhow, this began as an apology to Blue [JJWeb] for losing my temper
> at the blunt points he made, points that actually are intended to help
> me. Calling him a "cocksucker" was low... and hypocritically, I'd
> probably blast a troll with high handed insults if *they* sank to that
> level. Cool as I *am*, there's obviously a deep undercurrent of
> homophobia [or *shudder* is it lantent homosexuality?] in that knee
> jerk insult.
You probably aren't queer. Try sucking a few dozen cocks and if
you want more then maybe...
:-)
>
> And I'm surprised that nobody's called me on my strange mixture of
> goddess worship and misogyny. Nita Gale
> <http://midgetbigot.easyjournal.com/> was the *only* person who had
> the balls to call me on that, she used to love me, but obviously gave
> up on me years ago, as well.
I have tried to find goddesses to worship. Once I even courted
a professional Domme from L.A. who relocated with me for a time,
but shortly decided that I was more dominant and she more submissive.
Women are just clueless when it comes to sexuality and they
could potentially be incredibly powerful if they had even a small clue.
Their hormone levels are just in a totally different league.
I suggest there are now drugs that say they help women's libido.
Avamil or something?
Anyone try it?
>
> So, I'm seriously considering consulting Colin on the idea of giving
> me some poetry tutorial, as he [maybe joking, but interesting, anyhow]
> wrote on one of these threads: "The difference between [poetry
> craftwork] and a bad acid trip." I really want to learn the
> difference, since quite a bit of LSD, as well as weed and of course
> booze has gone down the hatch over the years... though lately it's
> almost always booze--- which for years I always said it was impossible
> for me to write [even my meager poetry] while drunk.
>
> Ah, well, enough for now... it's time to go out and play "pizza
> delivery technician" and my current absurd "advertising exectutive"
> gig [Hey! I *do* get out there and meet, greet, and get the phones
> ringing... whatever I'm doing with the flyers and promotion is selling
> pizza like never before. Pizza Roma has hired coupon passers for 15
> years, and Ben swears he's *never* had results like those I bring...
> sorry, the insecurity blleds through, who but *Will Dockery* would
> "brag" before, as Google announces, "potentially millions of readers"
> about being a pizza boy/coupon passer... *but* Shadowville is the "big
> fish small pond" archtype in a classic sense... could I make it in New
> York, Hollywood? I did well enough in Atlanta, but honestly Atlanta is
> pretty much just an overgrown Shadowville.][Get this, it's very easy
> to swell with pride when I hear things like the other day outside
> Pizza Roma as I stood with Pasko, Ben, Brando, Carol, and Woodstock
> Eddy having a joint, and i said, "Well my loves, it's off to my
> *advertising executive* coupon passing gig..." and Carol corrected me:
> "Your a poet." and of course I agreed.] and eventually I'll have to,
> as Blue pointed out: put up or shut up, or remain Poet Lawrry-ette of
> Shadowville.
Ha!
I bet you do better than Yipsilanti.
>
> I still think JRSherman's wrong, though: it *is* poetry.
> Will
>